Infinite

perks

“And in that moment I swear we were infinite.” You don’t know how much I wish to feel that everyday. I probably don’t understand the meaning the author meant, but nonetheless it’s my favorite quote. Yet, I probably live my life  in regret every single day.  Wanting the earth to stop spinning. To stop breathing. Is it sad to say that I probably wanted that ever since I was seven. Obviously when I was seven it was because of something so childish. I guess you can say I was always a depressed child. I had just moved to a new house in a new place. I was away from the one thing I knew…family.

I was falling like Woody in that one scene from Toy Story… falling into a wide unknown area where there was blackness all around. Just a child, but I know I was depressed. I was and still remains to be: should have I been that sad? Not! But I was and I remember when I was in second grade I would hold my breath and hope I would die. But back then I didn’t know what death was, nor how hard it was to achieve it. I didn’t know that if you died you wouldn’t be with the ones you love. I just wanted an escape from the ugly house. To be with my cousins who were like my siblings.

After years of tantrums and endless crying, I got fixed. Two years in this ugly house and well every thing was turning out well. Outstanding. I was finally starting to make friends. A best friend for each different year. I finally relied on more than just my cousins and sister. I had my own friends which I had thought was going to be impossible.

While I had originally thought that I was going to get out of elementary school friendless, I had a few friends. By then I saw the rainbow.

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